Why am I trying to fill myself with food?

Why do I feel like I'm filling up? What am I trying to fill?

If you've ever asked yourself these questions, you're in the right place.

We are going to explore the notion of emptiness and emotional overflow. When we eat our emotions, there is a link between the notion of emptiness and that of fullness.

We eat to fill ourselves, but why?

Emptiness and the need to fill up

Emptiness opposes fullness. Fullness is desirable while emptiness is anxiety-inducing.

We have often internalized that emptiness must be filled.
Beyond any individual dysfunction, it has almost become a societal standard.

This is a philosophical issue and a real societal issue: existing is no longer enough. To feel fully alive, one must be in constant action and in all kinds of consumption.

The vampire myth

In his book “Eating in Peace,” Dr. Gérard Apfeldorfer explains this phenomenon through the myth of the vampire, especially to explain emotional eating.

In this perspective, we think that the world around us and outside of us is rich, while inside we feel empty.

To remedy this emptiness, we need to proceed with a kind of transfusion, taking what is outside to put it inside, in a frantic manner. Storing to feel less empty.

In his book, he explains that this feeling of emptiness comes from a lack of emotions and thoughts. There are obviously emotions and thoughts – even many – but without access to them, without truly perceiving them.

This is how we turn to the outside world, in an attempt to procure intense sensations to feel more alive.

Devouring the world

People who suffer from emotional eating are often those who devour the world:

• very active at home

• performant at work

• often prey to a buying frenzy

• practicing extreme sports for some or traveling to the ends of the earth

• passionate love stories

As long as they are devouring, these people feel that their compulsions are cured. The recourse to food is less present, because their emptiness is filled by all this external agitation. They feel that they exist, so everything is fine.

The problem arises when the outside stops nourishing them. This is often the case in the evening after an intense day. A great emptiness is felt, like life extinguishing.

Or else, it’s the weekend, or after returning from vacation or after an intense breakup...

Emotional overflow

It may seem paradoxical that people who so desperately need to fill up with external emotions and intense sensations simultaneously seek to protect themselves from emotional overflow by shutting off their own emotions.

What Dr. Gérard Apfeldorfer explains to us in his book “Eating in Peace” is that the external emotional stimulants we seek by devouring the world are predictable emotions and therefore manageable.

When we buy compulsively, we know what emotion to expect. Likewise, when working intensely, endlessly scrolling on our phones, and of course eating.

These are repetitive behaviors, reassuring because they engender always identical emotions.

In contrast, emotions that catch them by surprise are frightening. We feel like we are subjected to them because we do not recognize them and do not know how to name them.

This is the kind of awareness that Foodelles will help you awaken. Ready for this inner journey?